i have been pondering lately why i seem to have the attraction toward guys who only see me as one of them, or if they do not see me as "one of the guys" they do not think i am awesome enough to date, but think i am awesome enough to spend a lot of time with? one can't help but feel rejected or in need of interaction with someone that makes her feel pretty and of value and actually treats her like a lady.
in all of this, the unfortionate fact surfaces that God cursed Eve (and us as daughters of eve) to desire after our husbands, to want a man... now i don't think that is bad all the time, but all to often it gets out of control, like it is in my life and so many other's. Don't get me wrong i enjoy my singleness, but at times i want to come home and not have to do everything and take care of everything. the thought of coming home and someone else making sure the bills are paid and the car is taken care of is incredibly appealing. lately, i have just increased in the desire for that partnership. this is where community has got to come in, but even in community roles i tend to be the one that takes on the role (or is given the role) of making sure everything is taken care of... i want to bust out of that mold....
anyway, those are just some thoughts
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